Comments on: How do you ask the person you adopted pets from to leave you alone? http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php Videos and articles on our furry and not-so-furry friends Mon, 15 Mar 2010 01:15:04 -0400 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: long-time fosterer http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php/comment-page-1#comment-1530 long-time fosterer Sat, 18 Apr 2009 11:07:30 +0000 http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php#comment-1530 You don't say how long it's been since the adoption. The foster mom may have been new at fostering, so may not have been prepared for her feelings on the adoption. That being said, tho, this type of contact, if not desired by the adopter and not provided in the adoption contract, is not appropriate. You probably need to be a little more firm in telling her that the animals are yours, now, and that you intend to give them a loving home and good care. Tell her that you need her to let go of the animals. If this doesn't work contact the rescue group and tell them about the problem. It's hard enough for rescue groups to find fosterers. If it realizes that this lady can't handle fostering emotionally perhaps they'll find something else for her to do. You don’t say how long it’s been since the adoption. The foster mom may have been new at fostering, so may not have been prepared for her feelings on the adoption. That being said, tho, this type of contact, if not desired by the adopter and not provided in the adoption contract, is not appropriate. You probably need to be a little more firm in telling her that the animals are yours, now, and that you intend to give them a loving home and good care. Tell her that you need her to let go of the animals. If this doesn’t work contact the rescue group and tell them about the problem. It’s hard enough for rescue groups to find fosterers. If it realizes that this lady can’t handle fostering emotionally perhaps they’ll find something else for her to do.

]]> By: KEF http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php/comment-page-1#comment-1529 KEF Wed, 15 Apr 2009 15:17:26 +0000 http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php#comment-1529 Call the rescue center explain the problem to them. Ask them if they would mind asking her to stop calling. Let them explain that they have done all the necessary research before allowing you to adopt the pets. If this doesn't work, you could always send her a certified letter asking her to leave you (and your pets) alone! Call the rescue center explain the problem to them. Ask them if they would mind asking her to stop calling. Let them explain that they have done all the necessary research before allowing you to adopt the pets. If this doesn’t work, you could always send her a certified letter asking her to leave you (and your pets) alone!

]]> By: kitra80 http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php/comment-page-1#comment-1528 kitra80 Wed, 15 Apr 2009 05:28:42 +0000 http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php#comment-1528 Hi! You have already gotten tons of feedback to this question but I just thought I'd weigh in. As a foster mom of pets I can tell you that it's hard to let them go when they get adopted, and your communication with the adoptive family varies with each situation. As you know your new pets are very lovable and you can understand her missing them and wanting to know how they are doing. So why don't you come up with a plan that works for everyone? Let her know that although you really want to keep her updated you are really busy and don't always have time to return calls or emails so you will send her an update once a week or twice a month via email. Decide on a day, like Monday, and put it on your calendar. Then every Monday or every other Monday send her a nice email updating her on the animals- include a cute or funny story or a digital photo and you will make her day! Don't think of it as an annoyance, think of it as a chance to brag about your wonderful pets to someone who will understands how great they are instead of your friends and coworkers who may just roll their eyes and be bored about you talking about them... again. Also, it's good that you let her know that if you have any questions or anything you will contact her. Everyone who volunteers their time and love to another living thing, whether it animal or person, has a hard time saying goodbye. Please be understanding and work out a mutually agreeable solution... and ignore all the people saying to get a restraining order. I mean, come on... Hi! You have already gotten tons of feedback to this question but I just thought I’d weigh in. As a foster mom of pets I can tell you that it’s hard to let them go when they get adopted, and your communication with the adoptive family varies with each situation. As you know your new pets are very lovable and you can understand her missing them and wanting to know how they are doing. So why don’t you come up with a plan that works for everyone? Let her know that although you really want to keep her updated you are really busy and don’t always have time to return calls or emails so you will send her an update once a week or twice a month via email. Decide on a day, like Monday, and put it on your calendar. Then every Monday or every other Monday send her a nice email updating her on the animals- include a cute or funny story or a digital photo and you will make her day! Don’t think of it as an annoyance, think of it as a chance to brag about your wonderful pets to someone who will understands how great they are instead of your friends and coworkers who may just roll their eyes and be bored about you talking about them… again. Also, it’s good that you let her know that if you have any questions or anything you will contact her. Everyone who volunteers their time and love to another living thing, whether it animal or person, has a hard time saying goodbye. Please be understanding and work out a mutually agreeable solution… and ignore all the people saying to get a restraining order. I mean, come on…

]]> By: karynkdj http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php/comment-page-1#comment-1527 karynkdj Mon, 13 Apr 2009 06:44:49 +0000 http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php#comment-1527 This is always a difficult situation. As a person who volunteers with and works closely with rescue groups, I can tell you that fostering a pet is one of the most rewarding and heartwrenching things to do. We sometimes do get too attached to the pets who come into our care, but that is because in a lot of cases, we see the pets at their lowest, and then are able to see them fully rehabilitated. As hard as it is sometimes to let the pet(s) go to their new homes, we know that there are 100s of others waiting for their second chance at life. Like many others have said, just send her an e-mail update with some pictures, and let her down easy. She will appreciate it more than you can ever know. Thanks for thinking adoption first!! This is always a difficult situation. As a person who volunteers with and works closely with rescue groups, I can tell you that fostering a pet is one of the most rewarding and heartwrenching things to do. We sometimes do get too attached to the pets who come into our care, but that is because in a lot of cases, we see the pets at their lowest, and then are able to see them fully rehabilitated. As hard as it is sometimes to let the pet(s) go to their new homes, we know that there are 100s of others waiting for their second chance at life.

Like many others have said, just send her an e-mail update with some pictures, and let her down easy. She will appreciate it more than you can ever know. Thanks for thinking adoption first!!

]]> By: CJ http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php/comment-page-1#comment-1526 CJ Thu, 09 Apr 2009 22:50:14 +0000 http://www.uptownpetwalk.com/how-do-you-ask-the-person-you-adopted-pets-from-to-leave-you-alone.php#comment-1526 I am a foster mom for a dachshund rescue, myself. I know how hard it is to let some of them go home. BUT she shouldn't be contacting you this often. How long ago did you adopt from her? If it was less than a month ago, give her a little more time to be sure that they are adjusting well to their new environment but I would only respond by email. Don't call her or return her calls. If it has been over a month, I would send her an email response to her calls/emails state I'm so sorry I haven't gotten back to you sooner - but we are just so busy. (dogs/cats names) are doing great! Thank you for fostering them helping them find us! I assure you they will have long healthy happy lives as important members in our family! Will send pictures when we get some! Happy New Year! I would also copy it to another person in the rescue - like the address on the website or something. That way it sort of shows the relationship that her part is done - without being rude risking her feeling that you are trying to hide something - which of course would make her call more! Good Luck thanks for rescuing!!! I am a foster mom for a dachshund rescue, myself. I know how hard it is to let some of them go home. BUT she shouldn’t be contacting you this often.

How long ago did you adopt from her? If it was less than a month ago, give her a little more time to be sure that they are adjusting well to their new environment but I would only respond by email. Don’t call her or return her calls.

If it has been over a month, I would send her an email response to her calls/emails state I’m so sorry I haven’t gotten back to you sooner – but we are just so busy. (dogs/cats names) are doing great! Thank you for fostering them helping them find us! I assure you they will have long healthy happy lives as important members in our family! Will send pictures when we get some! Happy New Year! I would also copy it to another person in the rescue – like the address on the website or something. That way it sort of shows the relationship that her part is done – without being rude risking her feeling that you are trying to hide something – which of course would make her call more! Good Luck thanks for rescuing!!!

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